Rethinking masculinity and role models - how to move away from the depravity model
In today’s complex social landscape, the question of how young men understand masculinity and their place in society has never been more urgent. On Father's Day, Headteacher and Father, Nick Hewlett, wrote an article in The Observer highlighting the challenges and opportunities we face in shaping healthier, more constructive models of manhood.
The crisis of masculinity and radicalisation among young men
Mr Hewlett, who is CEO of St Dunstan’s Education Group, paints a sobering picture of British masculinity as “lost, insecure, and at times toxic.” His research reveals that nearly half of young men aged 18-25 feel a scarcity of strong male role models, while many harbor resentment toward feminism, believing it has “gone too far.” This confusion is exacerbated by the retreat of young men into online spaces dominated by unregulated content that often distorts sex, body image, and success, promoting divisive and misogynistic narratives.
Supporting this view, a recent Monash University study highlights how “manfluencer” figures like Andrew Tate exploit self-improvement rhetoric as a gateway to extremist and misogynistic ideologies. Similarly, research by Equimundo and Futures Without Violence shows that nearly half of young men aged 18-23 find online communities more engaging than offline ones, with many trusting misogynistic voices. Yet, this research also reveals a hopeful nuance: young men’s desire for connection and belonging offers pathways to promote healthier masculinities and allyship for gender equality.
The role of education and positive role models
Hewlett emphasises the critical role schools can play by creating safe spaces for young men to explore identity, relationships, and gender in a nuanced way. His school’s curriculum includes discussions on pornography addiction, toxic gender representations, and the influence of online personalities, aiming to counteract harmful narratives. However, he warns that Relationships and Sex Education (RSE) remains fragmented and under-resourced, especially in the state sector, where over 90% of UK children are educated. He calls for government-led reforms to guarantee protected curriculum time, specialised teacher training, and adequate funding.
Importantly, Hewlett highlights that fathers and male teachers still serve as the most significant role models for many young men, underscoring the power of engaged parenting and mentorship to provide alternatives to toxic online influences.
Public figures and the question of role models: The case against Elon Musk
Mr Hewlett's article comes on the back of a recent heated debate on “Piers Morgan Uncensored” featuring Scott Galloway. I am not a regular viewer of the show, but I was intrigued by Galloway's comments (which entered my digital space), which offered a stark example of how public figures influence perceptions of masculinity. Galloway delivered a scathing critique of Elon Musk, condemning not only Musk’s behaviour, which included alleged drug use, his controversial public gestures, and his chaotic government leadership. But what was most interesting in the context of this discussion was his views on how there is now a societal tendency to excuse “depravity” because of wealth and innovation.
Galloway argued that true masculinity and prosperity should be measured by the ability to protect and uplift others, not by economic power or fame alone. This critique resonates deeply with Hewlett’s call for positive role models who embody responsibility, empathy, and integrity rather than mere success or notoriety. The debate underscores how influential men in the public eye can either reinforce or challenge toxic masculine norms.
Moving Forward: A Holistic Approach to Masculinity
Addressing the radicalisation and confusion among young men requires a multifaceted approach:
Educational Reform: Implement comprehensive, well-resourced RSE and SPHE curricula that address masculinity, gender, consent, and online safety with trained specialists.
Positive Role Models: Encourage engaged parenting, mentorship, and community leadership to provide real-life examples of healthy masculinity.
Online Engagement: Develop strategies to counteract harmful online content by creating positive digital communities that meet young men’s needs for connection and identity.
Public Accountability: Challenge societal tendencies to excuse harmful behavior in powerful men, promoting models of masculinity grounded in empathy, responsibility, and social contribution.
Inclusive Dialogue: Foster open conversations that respect diverse experiences of gender and sexuality, ensuring no group feels silenced or erased.
Conclusion
The challenges facing young men today from online radicalisation to confusing cultural messages are profound but not insurmountable. By combining insights from education, research, and public discourse, we can begin to reshape masculinity in ways that empower young men to thrive without resorting to toxicity or extremism. As Scott Galloway reminds us, being a man is not about wealth or power alone; it is about protecting and uplifting those around us. This is the legacy we should strive to pass on.
